because I’m seriously too lazy to blog, I shall just post the article I wrote for aCAPella to summarize the series of events that ran my life for the last week and the next bit to come.

Picture of Crazy Me.
Oh hai! I’m Ephraim and I wanted to introduce myself like Amy Winehouse. When Amy turns her black bewildered eyes towards the cameras, we too are bewildered. Why does she seem to want to kill herself with drugs? Is the source of her pain the source of her genius? Anyway, my master plan was working until I realised that a) I’m neither a beer-gorging singer nor writer with an impressive seven years résumé of alcoholic abstinence. b) My life isn’t an opera of violence and self destruction.
SO WHAT? I ALSO CAN BE EMO OK!
I kid, I kid… In my head, all you emo writers out there in CAP are the future Amy Winehouses. So I will love you and all your wacky interpretations of ‘journeying home’ –insert random operatic scream- !!! My head may not be a safe place.
Since writing in 3rd person is totally the in thing nowadays… Seriously though, Ephraim is actually quite a happy person & emotionally-charged writing is ok. Everyone has a story to tell, and if they want to, they should tell it. And this is Ephraim’s. Ephraim does confess to doubts. Sometimes, particularly with the diet columns, Ephraim looks and thinks – is that too much? Will Ephraim regret reading about the disgusting effects of the diet pill? While Ephraim attempts to pass off as a practitioner of this dark, self loathing art, he shall remind his dear little friends that they have to EAT EAT EAT! Chronic addiction to food (i.e. EATING LOTSA VEGGIES) is the only way to remain HIGH at CAP. PS. Don’t behave like you’re on crack during the stay. OR EPHRAIM WILL STUFF THE REAL THING UP YOUR TINY NOSTRILS.
Rant over, as head is hitting desk.

Picture of Happy Me!